Page Turner: The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant

The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant by Drew Hayes is a fantasy novel about the unlife of Fredrick Frankford Fletcher. After being turned and abandoned by an unknown vampire, Fred is left to deal with his vampirism alone and learn to live with new limits and abilities. 

You would think that being turned into a monster, or parahuman, would be a more dramatic and exciting affair. You would be wrong. Yeah, as it turns out, Hollywood was a bit off the mark. Who would have guessed? 

By the time we meet Fred, he has more or less got a handle on it, albeit living a very dull and lonely life. However, reuniting with an old friend opens him up to a new world once again. Meeting more folk in similar situations to him, finally finding friends.

Fred’s unlife might be a bloody mess, but he isn’t alone anymore.

Fred is a total sweetheart. Even though his heart no longer beats, he has retained his humanity and compassion. Despite his inhuman strength, he avoids conflict and tries to find other solutions with varying degrees of success. He endearingly is kind of a dork. 

The novel is a diary written by Fred, in-universe, allowing us to get inside his head. I am a sucker (pun semi intended) for these types of novels. 

“This book is dedicated to the uncool, uncoordinated, unexceptional, uncharming, uninteresting, and especially the unashamed. To everyone from the Awkwards to the Zeroes, living as the proud oddballs they are. This book is dedicated to my people.”

Drew Hayes, The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant

The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant is the first of seven novels. I’ll be honest, you can tell. Most of the novel is introductions to the main characters. However, I liked that. Each one of them is unique and likeable in their own special way. 

I would describe The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant as a lighter version of What We Do In The Shadows. The only difference is the town is, as I said, lighter with less dark imagery, although there is a bit in the novel. 

The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant is funny, action-packed and oddly charming. I loved it!