This ramble has been a long time coming. I have been postponing this as it is painful to write. However, I have been an open book on this blog, so I will continue to be, even now.
I have been writing on this little blog for going on six years. Needless to say, it has evolved over the years. I like to think that my content has improved significantly, from how the blog looks today to the quality of my writing. Is it perfect? Of course not! But neither am I, so it works.
Back in the early years, Nerd Rambles was mostly about anime, video games and movies. Over the years, I have experimented with different topics and ideas. Some worked, others didn’t. That is the nature of experimentation, trying a wide variety of ideas until you find what works.
On top of that, my own interests have shifted. I don’t watch as much anime as I used to, and in turn, I have been reading a lot more books. Since I write about what I am passionate about, this has impacted Nerd Rambles. In the past year and a bit, I have been including more bookish content and don’t write as often about anime or manga. I don’t think it’s a bad thing, but I have to admit there is a growing concern.
I want to make content that you want to read, but I fear that I don’t know what that is.
My views are much lower than they used to be. Not shockingly low, but enough that I have been worried. That a pesky voice in the dark corners of my mind has been whispering, “you are failing”. It feels like I am growing stale or something.
I’m not foolish, I know I grew originally from one type of content, and now I don’t make said content as frequently. That is a contributing factor, but surely that can’t be the only reason? Which is when that pesky voice chimes in, with “maybe you just suck at blogging now”. That thought and others like it bounce around my skull every time I sit down to write these days. It’s demoralising and kills my motivation. Quite simply, it hurts.
With all that in mind, it leads to one question. What do I do about it?
Well, that’s the issue. I have no idea.
I want to keep writing. I love writing, and I am so proud of this blog and its growth. I half-jokingly refer to it as my pride and joy. Yet, I know I can’t keep going on like this when the thought of writing often fills me with dread. Panicking before hitting the publish button because I am anxious that what I wrote isn’t good enough.
It doesn’t help that I can’t figure out what does well as it keeps fluctuating. One week, a book review does amazing, another it flops. The only consistent trend is that when I write about gaming, that tends to do poorly. That sucks since I am still a passionate gamer, so I want to write about them. But do I stop because it doesn’t get as much traction? I don’t know.
I don’t want to give up writing, but I feel the burnout growing stronger. I fear that if I step away for a break, I will never get back into the writing habit again. Then again, I can’t keep going on like this.
This rant boils down to, well, I have no idea what to do. So, I am asking for advice from you. If you like reading my work, what do you want to see on here? Please tell me in the comments, or vote on the poll on my Twitter. I truly appreciate any feedback you are willing to offer.
Thank you so much for your continued support.