Hopes and Fears: 2020

I have no idea what is in store for me next year, I don’t have 2020 vision.

Sorry, this is one of my last chances to use that joke and you best believe I’m using it to the last second!

giphy (4)Terrible jokes aside, this year has been a weird one. On a personal note this has been one of the most distressing years for me due to health (both physical and mental), work and family.

I spent most of the year stressed and upset, panicking more often than normal. Yeah, not fun.

However, in these last couple of months, things started to improve.

I will be starting a new job in the new year, meaning I’ll be given the opportunity to start fresh and begin climbing that career ladder at long last. I feel like my life is finally starting to get back on track, that I am on the path I need to be. I hope that this truly is the case.

Of course, it will not be a cakewalk, but anything in life worth having is going to require hard work.

Speaking of work, I hope I can continue to improve in all aspects of my life. From mental health to the content I write for this blog, any progress is good progress after all. I don’t know if folks have noticed but I now make my own headers. I think they look alright but I still have a lot to learn.

While things seem to be moving in the right direction, I fear that something will come up and I will not be able to handle it. Leading me to fall back into my old ways, back at square one. That my insecurities and doubt will prevent me from moving forward or send me flying backwards.

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I can only hope that when that curveball is thrown I am able to deal with it without sacrificing all the progress I have made up to that point.

I suppose there isn’t really much of a point in stressing about a whole year already. Even if my worst fears come true, worrying about it now isn’t going to help me when it happens. I’m going into 2020 prepared for the worst but hoping for the best.

See you in a decade!

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