I have written a few personal articles here and there and while I debated whether or not to open up online about some topics due to the kind words and support that I received I have decided that I will continue to open up on my blog.
Which brings me to the topic at hand. I will post content like this every now and again but it won’t be too common, so don’t worry about that.
I like winter. When everything is covered in snow it makes the world look more innocent and beautiful plus nothing compares to reading a good book with a nice cup of hot chocolate next to a roaring fire wrapped up in a soft blanket.
That is all well and good, but winter is also one of the most stressful times for me. I have to walk to work, a decent three-mile walk. Normally it isn’t so bad, in fact at certain times of the year like autumn and spring it is lovely.
But in the bitter cold Scottish winters, particularly last year, walking in the snow that nearly comes up to your calves when it is pitch black at 5pm after a long shift. Yeah, less than ideal.
Not to mention work. I work in a card shop and as you might guess it gets extremely busy around this time of year. This is also when customers get a bit more demanding and snappy if you can’t get the exact item they want in a split second. Worse come to worse, they might even get aggressive.
Then there is college. I have a lot of coursework I have to complete and of course study but not a lot of time due to work. Often I tell myself “I’ll do it after work” or “I can do this as soon as I get home, no worries!” yet the second I drag myself home I collapse onto the bed. If I could just go to sleep that would be fine but I only tend to finally get some shut eye around 1am on a good day.
I have mentioned a few times now (for those of you who read my blog every now and again, you must be getting sick of hearing this) I have Autism and I’m the sort of person who panics easily. My mother even said that she believes it is getting worse. I have to agree. This time of year is lethal to my mental health.
I have started to grow weary of winter and even feel kinda sick of Christmas. While the day itself is a nice day with family I dread the run up to it. For me, it’s a time of hard work, harsh weather and horrific stress.
I have tried to take action to prevent this seasonal slump this year. Namely tried to get as much work done for college earlier so I don’t stress out about it, which didn’t work.
The only thing that seems to have helped me is tea and taking some time to myself, whether that is reading a chapter or two or playing a game for a little bit. I even made a playlist of my favourite soundtracks from games and movies to help when I write or study.
This may be ‘the most wonderful time of the year’ for some, but for me it is hellish. Hopefully, things will get better once the holiday rush is over.