Posted in Editorial

Dumb Theories

One of the great parts about being in the nerd community is without a doubt the discussions you get involved in. Particularly ones discussing theories.

The internet is filled of these interesting theories. There are a lot out there that are not only plausible but often well-argued and fascinating. In some cases it turns out to be correct in the shows cannon, take for example Gravity Falls. The show itself has layer upon layer of mystery and fans correctly figured out the identity of the author of the Journals (no spoilers here!) so the shows creators had to reveal it earlier than planned.

However, for every fantastic well researched theory we get, we have two lazy nonsense ones. Theories so ridiculous that smashing your head on your keyboard would make a better read that these idiotic “theories” So, without further a due. The top worst fan theories.

Everyone is DEAD?!?!

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I decided to lump these together as this list would mostly comprise of this type of theory. Almost every second theory you find online “proves” that some or all of the characters are dead. Don’t get me wrong, some of these theories are pretty good, such as the Ed, Edd and Eddy Cul-de-sac purgatory theory.

Quite a lot are rather lame and uninventive. Take for instance the Bob’s Burgers theory that claims Bob’s wife and kids are all dead and the show is about him communicating with the ghosts of his family members or him remembering his family, depending on which version you read. Or better yet, the Rugrats are all dead theory. Basically all the Rugrats died besides Angelica who imagines them to alive, growing up she became a drug addict which allowed her to “remember” these memories and she told Susie, who then grew up to make the show Rugrats when Angelica died of an overdose.

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Once you start reading these theories you start to notice a pattern, that they are all pretty much the same. Also they have little to no evidence in the show. This type is more or less the default theory type.

Voodoo care bears.

I am genuinely shaking my head as I’m writing this. Apparently, some people online believe that the care bears represent different Voodoo Lwa (godly spirts). This has a lot of detail behind this one which I don’t really want to go into so I’ll include a video that explains the theory if you want the full story.


Frankly I can’t bring myself to justify this theory with a response. It might seem decent at first read, but it falls at an important hurdle like many theories. It clearly isn’t anything more than speculation. Do you really think the creators would make a show about Voodoo candy coloured bears who shoot lights out their stomach? No, why? Because the show staff were concerned with only one thing, selling toys. Nothing more, nothing less. Mystery solved!

Big Frozen Tangled theory.

Apparently, the cast of Frozen are related to the characters in Big Hero Six. Ready your palms, people!

Part one of this theory says that Aunt Cass is the descendant of Anna. Why? Because they both stress eat, tuck their hair behind their ears and they both wave the same way. Fred is, apparently, Hans’s descendant. This is because his dad, Stan Lee of all people, looks like Hans and there is a statue of him in their garden. According to the theory, Honey Lemon is the direct descendant of Rapunzel, because they react the same way.

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I don’t think I really need to say this, but that is not how genetics work! The only one that has any degree of believability is the Fred one, as that is the only one that has a direct reference to Hans. However, even at that it’s unlikely considering what happened to Hans. The statue is just a reference to Frozen. That is all. Also, the only real connection the women have is that they were probably animated by the same people, resulting in similar reactions and emotions.

Theory writers, I know you can do better. Step up your game! Heck, even I can weave a better theory that these ones!

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Author:

Growing up, Megan was that one kid at the back of class reading manga. Now, not much has changed except she started a blog. Basically, your typical geek (although she prefers the term Otaku)

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